Recently, this came across my Twitter feed.
When I read it, my heart sighed a little bit because this has been my state of mind lately. I have to say that I am not proud of it. I should know better, but I also know the master of deceit would like me to believe otherwise and would stop at nothing to make me believe it.
I don’t think it is difficult to get our mind to follow this terrible path. In fact, don’t we ask our loved ones to prove their love to us? How do I know my husband loves me? He buys me presents. He tries to make me happy. When do I feel unloved by my husband? When he is quiet. When the attention isn’t focused on me. How about my children? I know that my children think that I do not love them when I discipline them. I remember the days. Who feels loved when they are grounded from their favorite activity? You don’t love me! If you loved me, you would let me do (insert activity here).
This is how I talk to God sometimes. If you love me at all, God, you would make my life a lot easier. You would take away this pain that I have in my heart. If you love me, why do I feel so miserable?
I started teaching Sunday School when I was in high school. I had the preschool class. I loved the preschoolers. I remember asking them questions like “Have you ever been scared?” Oh, the answers I would get! Every single one of them would have a story to tell me, and each child would want to outdo the last one who told their story. Then I could ask them, “Who was with you when you were scared?” And every single one of them would shout, “JESUS!” I could ask them, “Why was He with you?” And they would shout, “Because He LOVES US!” I can still see them in my mind jumping out of their little chairs in order to make sure that I could hear them.
They never questioned Jesus love for them. They KNEW he loved them. Their faith never questioned. What did Jesus do for us? They would yell, “HE died on the cross!” Is it any wonder why Jesus told his disciples to let the little children come to Him for theirs is the kingdom of heaven?
Oh, that I would have the faith of a 3 year old! Have I ever been anxious? Yes. Who is with me? Jesus. How do I know He love me? He died on the cross. Jesus did not promise me an easy life. He did not promise me that He would make my life on this earth easy. In fact, He promised me the opposite. Why do I ask Him to prove His love for me in ways that are so trivial? I ask Him to fix all my problems and to prove His love for me. What does He reply? “For you, Tressa, I died. Sin and death have no power over you. Stop doubting my love for you and believe!”
Give me the faith of a little child!
Jesus loves me this I know,
For the Bible tells me so.